Is this your first time playing the role of a carer for an elderly relative? If so, this article is for you.
Caring is a noble act that brings a sense of fulfilment, but it also comes with its fair share of challenges. Ensuring that the needs of another person are met while looking after yourself is no easy task.
As a first-time carer, you may not know what to expect or how to deal with the challenges that arise. For this reason, we have sought advice from experienced carers and health professionals to provide you with the information you need for your new role.
Below are listed 11 savvy tips that can help any non-professional carer supporting an adult in the UK.
1. Recognise that you are a carer
Surprisingly, many people don’t realise when they are transitioning into the role of a carer. It may not be until your husband develops dementia or your mother is unable to walk that you realise you are now more than a spouse—you are their carer.
Even after realising this, many people find it hard to accept. You may not want to be labelled as a carer, or it may make the experience feel more overwhelming. However, according to experienced carers, acknowledging your role can go a long way in softening the transition and helping you find support and understanding.
2. Know you are not alone
Being a carer means being responsible for the well-being of your loved one while also managing your own life. At times, balancing these can feel overwhelming, and that’s okay. Always remember that you are not alone.
Don’t hesitate to share your worries with friends when you feel overwhelmed—a problem shared is a problem halved. There are also many in-person and online support groups that can provide relief. We recommend searching online for ‘carers’ support in [your local area]’.
3. Know it’s okay to have a bad day
Being a carer can be rewarding and enjoyable, but it can also present some of the most challenging experiences you will face—something only another carer will truly understand.
Always remind yourself that you are strong and that bad days do not last. Take each day as it comes, and see setbacks as part of a learning curve.
4. Get advice from experts
No one expects you to know everything. During the first few months of being a carer, you will encounter situations where you need advice. It only makes sense to seek it from those who have been through similar experiences.
They say experience is the best teacher. Take advantage of the wisdom of experienced carers and learn how they handled challenges. There is a wealth of information available in online care forums.
5. Get a full assessment of your loved one
Health professionals recommend that first-time carers obtain a comprehensive needs assessment for the person they are caring for. This is essential, as it will help you understand the type of care your loved one requires. In this way, you can play your role more effectively.
Additionally, a needs assessment will help you discover the types of support to which you may be entitled. Speak to your local adult social services and involve your loved one as much as possible to ensure you are both on the same page.
Depending on your loved one’s needs, you may be entitled to financial support, specialist equipment, or a blue badge for your car (to enable you to park in disabled spaces when out with your loved one).
6. Claim all available financial support
There are several ways to access financial assistance as a carer. Firstly, ensure you are claiming all national and local funding available to you, including Carer’s Allowance, Attendance Allowance, PIP, Council Tax Reduction, Carer’s Credit, and Pension Credit. You can also explore options such as equity release or deferred payment schemes.
Feeling overwhelmed? Don’t worry, we’ve put together a detailed article about all these options.
7. Explore all available services for carers
Once you’ve had an assessment, explore all the services available to you. Some may be provided by your local authority, while others could come from companies or charities designed to support carers and those they care for. These services may include professional carers to supplement your time, technology designed to monitor well-being, reminder and check-in services (like ours), and a range of local events designed to support carers.
8. Take time out for yourself
There may be times when you find yourself more focused on your loved one’s needs and neglecting your own. You might stop taking time for the activities that sustain you, but this is not sustainable.
Taking care of yourself is not selfish. In fact, it shows that you care about your loved one as well. It is difficult to provide care when you are not okay yourself—you cannot pour from an empty cup.
Whenever you feel overwhelmed, it’s okay to take time out. Enjoy a weekend getaway or even just a much-needed nap. If you need an extended break, there are home care centres that can care for your loved one while you recharge.
9. Understand what you are supposed to do
Experienced carers recommend that, as a first-time carer, you should clearly outline what you are expected to do. You and the person you care for should agree on this, and creating a physical list is a great way to stay organised. Your list might include cooking, bathing, medication, or other personal and household tasks.
Understanding your role as a carer helps you be more effective and allows you to plan your day, maintaining balance. This also helps smooth the relationship between you and your elderly loved one.
10. Communication is key
In every relationship, communication is vital. As a first-time carer, you will likely become the voice of your loved one. Be vocal about what your loved one needs and what is best for them.
Additionally, try to create an environment where you can communicate freely with the person you are caring for. Keep them engaged in the care process and maintain a personal connection.
11. Inform your GP that you are a carer
It is important that your doctor knows you are a carer. This will allow you to access additional healthcare services, such as a free flu jab and flexible appointment times.
In conclusion, being a carer for the first time can be challenging. You may not know what to expect or how to handle it, but remember that you are not alone, and there are many ways to make the experience easier to navigate.
